Evidence based formula feeding vs breastfeeding

Congratulations on your new baby. I saw a GP that was a lactation consultant and that was really useful for me.

First child I didn’t establish feeding and he would have got really small amounts of milk but probably some collustrum. Second child had a lot of formula at the start but we did get feeding established and she fed past 12 months with minimal formula after the first 2 months. So you don’t have to call it now.

There was a Facebook page for bottle feeders that i remember as being quite reasonable. Will have a look and see if it is still around.

Nothing to add in terms of evidence for breastfeeding vs formula . But I wanted to reply to say to you that if the bottle is going to allow you to enjoy these precious few weeks with your baby , then do it . I had major issues breastfeeding my firstborn, I persevered for 6 weeks and I ended up with severe PND and two admissions to a psychiatric hospital. There were other factors at play but the difficulties I had breastfeeding was definitely a major one.

I don’t know why we put so much pressure on mothers to breastfeed . Even if there is concrete evidence that breastmilk is better for babies , that doesn’t mean that every mother should or can breastfeed.

OP, enjoy your baby . He/she will thrive whether you decide to breast feed or formula feed . Look after yourself.

Edited for typos

OP, I really feel for you - I fully understand the pressure to breastfeed. I had 3 completely different experiences - with my first I did a combination of breastfeeding, pumping and formula for 3 months before I just couldn't mentally keep going and switched to formula feeding, my second took to breastfeeding really well and it was so easy after a few weeks of getting established, with my third I ended up pumping for 6 months until I couldn't bear the sight of the pump any longer. Each baby was so different and each experience was too.

My only regret in any of it is that I didn't switch to formula feeding earlier with my first as it really impacted my mental health and the bond I had with her. Switching to formula was such an incredible relief and it gave me time to actually be a mother, and that is so much more valuable.

I do remember doing lots of research at the time for articles to make me feel less guilty and found one that looked at all the data and concluded that in first world countries, formula feeding is a great option and that breastfeeding might mean one less episode of gastro for your child. I figured I could live with that. This could have been the article, it's very similar in that it looks at data from siblings who were breast feed and formula feed. https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/everybody-calm-down-about-breastfeeding/

Whatever you decide, goodluck! Congratulations on your new baby and enjoy all of those wonderful baby snuggles.

Thanks again everyone for your kind encouragement and the information provided. I feel a lot better knowing the differences are slight. If there were large differences I would see that as motivation to continue. But small differences? That just affirms there are two good choices!

I’m currently up with the babe, haven’t been to bed yet tonight because I’ve spent all the time she was sleeping pumping and sorting out my blocked ducts. She’s been cluster feeding and now she’s really unsettled, crying and drawing her knees to her chest like her tummy hurts. Gah. This is a tough gig. Lucky she’s cute!

I’ll keep my appointment tomorrow with the lactation consultant and see what she says. If we could get nipple shields working quickly then I’ll keep going for a bit longer. If we can’t, that’s it.

Thanks again everyone. Your perspectives are much appreciated!

good luck OP

as you say, its minor differences

i FF my dd from about 6 weeks as i couldnt cope, but she is healthy, intelligent and rarely sick

TBH i dont think it matters as a connection is made when feeding regardless of the how, and for me less stress and pain via bottle meant i could really enjoy the feeds

if baby is fed and you relaxed, nothing is wrong with that

dont feel pressured by what other people say is right, do what is right for YOU - it is not wrong

Another vote for fed is best. I did BF, EBM and FF with my boys. Nipple shields were a sanity saver for me when BFing. Interestingly I found that I felt little pressure to keep breastfeeding (from health professionals, family etc - I put a lot of pressure on myself!) because I had twins - fed is best was totally the message I got. I really felt for mums with singletons and the pressure they felt. FWIW I understand that WHO concerns about formula for bubs is due to the lack of availability of clean drinking water in developing countries- in that case BFing does have significant advantages.

Do what is best for you and don’t underestimate the benefits of a happy mum

Another vote for fed is best. I did BF, EBM and FF with my boys. Nipple shields were a sanity saver for me when BFing. Interestingly I found that I felt little pressure to keep breastfeeding (from health professionals, family etc - I put a lot of pressure on myself!) because I had twins - fed is best was totally the message I got. I really felt for mums with singletons and the pressure they felt. FWIW I understand that WHO concerns about formula for bubs is due to the lack of availability of clean drinking water in developing countries- in that case BFing does have significant advantages.

Do what is best for you and don’t underestimate the benefits of a happy mum

Yep, the 'breast is best' is an absolutely valid campaign in areas where, as you say, poor availability of clean drinking water. Poverty also means people dilute the powder more than is recommended. Poor people don't need to be pressure into buying all the palaver you need for bottle feeding AND the time, energy and resources to keep the stuff clean.

Otherwise, when someone can point to people in the street in a wealthy country and tell whether they've been bottle fed or not, I'll sit up and take notice. Ironically, the only one of my five siblings who was bottle fed has the best teeth.

Like you, I put pressure on myself to do it, was glad I did when I worked out what the issue was and got it sorted, but the first three or four months were a nightmare.

For a while, formula feeding was pretty normal. And all those kids are adults now and doing fine.

My biggest regret with my first born was “breastfeeding” him for so long. It wasn’t breastfeeding really, it was crappy feeds with nipple shields, then pumping, then topping up. I wasted so much time that I could have spent just being with my baby. I lost all his waking hours to trying to feed him. We never got to just cuddle and play. I don’t know why I did that to us both. There is just ridiculous pressure to breastfeed.

Switching to formula was the best thing I did for both of us. I just wish I hadn’t waited 6 months to do it

Enjoy your baby, feed your baby, don’t make my mistake and struggle on for months when it’s not working.

I regretted not stopping sooner with DS1. I felt a lot of pressure to BF but DS1 was not happy, I was not happy and it really did affect our bonding so I think I would have been better off stopping sooner.

I ended up mix feeding DD as I had repeated blocked ducts and an infection that made feeding agony. No one ever judged me and it’s had no impact on her growth, health or connection with me. In fact, her first ever feed was formula due to her situation at birth.

You have to do what is best for you, and if that’s formula, then that’s what you do.

The only thing that worked for me with blocked ducts was hand expressing in the shower. And I only did that because I did get mastitis and wanted to avoid it as much as possible

Day 3/4- it’s probably your milk coming in. It’s really uncomfortable when that happens- so much engorgement.

Newborn nappies with water in them popped in the fridge and used as a nappy bra can help.

The other thing I’d suggest is when expressing, have you checked the flange size? If there’s damage while pumping- something isn’t right! The flanges might be the wrong size and rubbing etc.

I stupidly kept breastfeeding for maybe 6 months and it didn't get better. For me it contributed to PND and resenting my baby for a very long time. BF may give better immunity/less allergies although it didn't work for mine.

Fed and liked would have been much better for my bub.

All the best with your decision.

I'm chiming in to echo what others have said: "Fed is Best"." I felt a lot of pressure with my first baby to breastfeed, and it was so hard. I now realise that I had low supply (he wanted to feed constantly, as did my second baby) but no one ever mentioned that to me. I wish I had been able to supplement them with formula, because I had a baby stuck on me for the best part of 3 years.

With my twins, I had no choice but to express for them, and that's when it became apparent my supply was low. So they had donor milk, then formula top-ups as I tried to breastfeed them and also express. It was exhausting and eventually I switched them onto formula only. There are other health issues in play for them, but in terms of regular sickness they haven't been any more or less unwell than my first two. I am so glad I made that choice to give them formula.

For a while, formula feeding was pretty normal. And all those kids are adults now and doing fine.

Lol I made that point once looooong ago on 9EB and someone actually replied 'well imagine how much smarter you would be if you had been breastfed'. I mean - what the actual??? Maybe it would have cured my jack jumper allergy too

OP feed the baby however you feel you can. This looks different for everyone. Parenting looks different for everyone. Fed is best.

I had similar issues to you and was lucky enough to stumble up on a lactation consultant who had used mixed feeding for her own four children. What a godsend she was! She armed me with all the information I needed to fend off unhelpful suggestions.

I managed to comp feed my eldest with formula, pumping and bfing for 3 months and my second child for 6 weeks before eldest got admitted to hospital for a week and it all went to hell in a hand basket. Thank goodness for grandma and a baby that was happy to take a bottle.

Anecdotally: both my kids have IQs in the top 1%. No serious allergies. Tall for their ages and have always been slim. Did have ear infections but they run in my family. Way, way less sickly than their cousins who were EBF. And I’m still not in menopause at 53.

There is so much pressure to bf but there is so much more to being a mother than the way you feed. Take care.

So many great replies in this thread!

A couple of extra things to keep in the back of your mind which are less process related - please don't feel overwhelmed by this extra info, I just found it impacted on the feeding as well - don't forget things like tongue tie and various intolerances (eg dairy) can also affect feeding, particularly breast, but also occasionally formula feeding esp if there are dairy/soy issues at play.

So many great replies in this thread!

A couple of extra things to keep in the back of your mind which are less process related - please don't feel overwhelmed by this extra info, I just found it impacted on the feeding as well - don't forget things like tongue tie and various intolerances (eg dairy) can also affect feeding, particularly breast, but also occasionally formula feeding esp if there are dairy/soy issues at play.

Thanks. Good points I’ll need to keep in mind. She doesn’t seem to latch very well on a bottle either, she makes a clicking sound with every suck. And her sister was CMPI and soy intolerant. So I’ll need to be aware of those issues.

Leaving for LC appt soon. Thanks for the support everyone. My mind is so much clearer now. I feel like I am open to any possibility now and have a clearer idea of what I am happy to put up with and what I am not.

Just an update for anyone interested. The LC was amazing. I can feed with discomfort but not pain with nipple shields so will go with that at least until my blocked ducts are clear and this engorgement period has passed. Then I’ll reassess whether it’s working and if not will tailor breastfeeds off gradually. The LC didn’t try to steamroll me at all which was wonderful.

I can’t thank everyone enough for the support and words of kindness. Thank you EB.

Clicking at every feed can be a strong symptom of tongue ties. That can impact the ability to drain the breast as well as causing pain.

I’m happy to hear you got some help and assistance.

I'm glad you're going ahead with nipple shields - I cannot express (boom tish) how much they helped me. It's only due to one midwife sneaking them in to me that I even knew what they were.

The other midwives and the health service, not to mention a pharmacist or two, were SO down on nipple shields, giving me dire warnings that they'd dry up my milk. Well, given DD1 massacred my nipples, it was that or formula, and they're what got me through - and we used them for weeks. Maybe two months? The information those health professionals had was a bit out of date, the modern shields are very different, and they're the only reason DD1 continued to be breastfed. Don't listen to pharmacists etc when you buy them that tut at you, if they're still doing that.

I also strongly second the hydrogel pads. Those things are wonderful. Between DD1 and DD2 they started to show up everywhere, including supermarkets, which was a godsend.

And in the end, of course, fed is best. Doing the best you can does not involve mums wrecking themselves in order to avoid formula!

Clicking can definitely indicate a tongue tie. Did the LC check baby's mouth thoroughly? My DD had an undiagnosed TT and had trouble using breast-like bottle teats. She basically couldn't even get a drop out of them. A simple plain teat worked really well. She was easily able to work that to get the milk out. When she was about a month old I switched her to orthodontic teats which she could also cope well with. We never breastfed. She couldn't latch.

I'm glad that the LC appointment went well and that she supported you without steamrolling you. I hope the blockages clear up easily.

Just an update for anyone interested. The LC was amazing. I can feed with discomfort but not pain with nipple shields so will go with that at least until my blocked ducts are clear and this engorgement period has passed. Then I’ll reassess whether it’s working and if not will tailor breastfeeds off gradually. The LC didn’t try to steamroll me at all which was wonderful.

I can’t thank everyone enough for the support and words of kindness. Thank you EB.

Thanks for the great update! So glad the LC was so good. Your description of using nipple shields was exactly what it was like for me until everything settled down a bit. You are doing an amazing job for you and bub

I never even tried breastfeeding the second time round.

FF fed babies who don't have other heath issues, seem to sleep better. I have two healthy, thriving babies that I bonded with.

Personally I think doing that bloody BLW is more important. Even though it's super messy.

I never wanted to breast feed because I have extremely sensitive nipples and thought breast feeding would be agony. But when my baby was born, the midwives asked if I wanted to see if he would latch, so I did. I felt pressured to breast feed through cracked and bleeding nipples and hour-long feeds where baby would just not stop sucking. When I finally broke by the morning of my third day in hospital after a c-section and was bawling my eyes out, saying I wanted to formula feed, the midwives were all like "are you really sure" etc and telling me the LC would swing by. I was so exhausted from getting out of the bed with a c-section to get my baby from the cot to feed him I fell asleep with him in my arms. When I woke I was so guilty tears just streamed non-stop from my eyes. I had to sign a waiver that I understood that I would be formula feeding and not breast feeding. It's the worst memory of my time in the hospital besides being alone the two nights with a baby as a first time mum, recovering from major surgery and struggling to feed a baby through the pain.

6 weeks on and feeding him formula is exhausting enough, I couldn't imagine how breast-feeding mothers do it, kudos to you all, you are so much stronger than me.