Tweenager support thread..

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riotproof
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#1

DS is 11. Suddenly my house has this bundle of irritation, hormones and testiness. Doors slamming all the time. His face is a pimplefest, and even though he’s got cleanser, he forgets to wash it off which irritates the skin and him when I remind him to do it.

Today he broke the pump toothpaste I buy because they are incapable of squeezing a tube without making a mess, because he threw it. I couldn’t work out how it could have broken from normal use, he did own up after a few questions.

Where did my sweet boy go?
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VeritasVinumArte
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#2

We went for Cetaphil facial wipes so they didn’t have to wipe anything off. Don’t discount going to the Dr for help with pimples and acne. My eldest was on Roaccutane at 12 his acne was that bad. It did do wonders for his skin.

We would calmly call out any disrespect (along the lines of “would you do that in front of Mrs X (scary vice principal)? Then why do you believe it is acceptable to do in front of us?”.

I now have 13/15yos who I would say are great 99% of the time. Miss 11 on the other hand is a complete mess and doesn’t respond to stuff like her brother’s did.
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Jenflea
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#3

DD turns 11 in 2 months and I'm already dreading these years.
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riotproof
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#4

Thanks, I will put those wipes on the list.
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Kadoodle
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#5

DD2 is 12. She’s currently FTAGH.
Plant a flower, feed a bee.
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riotproof
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#6

Lol! I was just about to google that acronym.
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Blondie
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#7

Thanks for the wipes suggestion - cant get my boys to cleanse. the 15yo cant comprehend what to do and the tween forgets.
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Pinkflamingo
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#8

DD is 12 in just under a month - she’s been waking up during the night and coming into our room/bed. I take her back if I wake up, but sometimes I just think “stuff it, she probably won’t want anything to do with us soon”, and let her stay, luckily she’s only small. She finds it hard to go back to sleep if she wakes up during the night. We have relocated the dog to the bathroom to curb his night time barking!!
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Zogee
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#9

My 12 yo is either on top of the world or there’s a literal storm cloud above her head. No happy medium!! She just had her first week of high school and I think she’s emotionally exhausted. Lots of friendship stuff to navigate and one of her old primary school friends has been a real cow to her online.
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riotproof
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#10

So, ds wasn’t getting anything out of swimming, and we let him quit. He can do all the strokes, it’s just not stylistically perfect like the school aims for, but they are all about training for racing as they get older. So, no worries right? Now dh is forced to go back in the office, ds has to come along again every time for DD’s lessons...

Last night, he informed me that this is “TORTURE!” mainly because people are always talking or playing their games and no one knows to use headphones etc etc so he can’t even concentrate on a book.. and I am just laughing at the drama. And then he took the bins out to the street, which had some heavy brake stuff in it and oh lord, the carry on.
Then he said the only good thing about bins is bringing in the empty, so I had to promise to leave that chore for him this afternoon.
I mean really? Christ on a bike.

This morning.. ray of actual sunshine. Got ready, didn’t poke sister, packed bag, super happy.
A thanks means a hug, I’m so sorry, I hear you, totally agree.. depending on the context.
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Seayork2002
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#11

I found myself doing this as DS gets older I forget sometimes he is 13 (i mean that genuinely but not that I forget his actual age just the fact he is older) and we have to step back and let him decide for himself more, now we are doing that there is less dramas

It sounds obvious but we have to pull ourselves up on it sometimes, as long as he feels we are listening he is calmer
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riotproof
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#12

You’re very wise sometimes, seayork. I think it’s easy to forget that everyone else is going through the same thing, but they only feel safe enough to do it at home.
A thanks means a hug, I’m so sorry, I hear you, totally agree.. depending on the context.
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Lees75
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#13

Phisohex wash has done wonders for my teens’ acne. We just keep it in the shower.
Lisa
DS17 and DD14
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Seayork2002
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#14

riotproof wrote: Tue Feb 23, 2021 9:59 am You’re very wise sometimes, seayork. I think it’s easy to forget that everyone else is going through the same thing, but they only feel safe enough to do it at home.
steady on! I wouldn't go that far (but thanks) he drives up us up the wall sometimes but he is a good kid, I just remember how I wanted my parents to be with me when I was young and go with that, mind you I have great parents
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riotproof
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#15

I did qualify it with “sometimes” lol.
A thanks means a hug, I’m so sorry, I hear you, totally agree.. depending on the context.
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Chicken Pie
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#16

Lees75 wrote: Tue Feb 23, 2021 10:04 am Phisohex wash has done wonders for my teens’ acne. We just keep it in the shower.
ordering right now - poor DD has prescribed cream etc but now she has her period they ouch
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CrankyM
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#17

It’s the yoyoing of emotions that gets to me. Mr 12 is up and down and up and down and sometimes I have no clue which kid I’m going to get. I think sometimes he feels like he’s not quiet ready to be at the level of independence expected of him (4th week of highschool here and it’s all a bit rocky after a good start) and then he gets cranky and does silly stuff because he can. But then wants independence at the same time and to be treated as a almost teen. All of that turns it into a roller coaster. (Add in he still needs his mum in his corner and making sure we show we love him).
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VeritasVinumArte
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#18

We have just organised a MasterCard Debit card for Miss 11 (grade 6) so at the end of this term/next term she can organise to get herself (along with 2 friends) from school to a class that starts 4.30pm locally. So they can have some independence and get some afternoon tea etc and feel more “grown up”. All girls are youngest in their family with Brothers same grades as Middle brother (both girls) and Oldest brother (1 other girl).
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Newme
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#19

I have have an 11.5yo and 2 almost 13yos. So many tears!
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